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View Full Version : I saw my grandpa by accident after 10 years.


Anagaharad
01-03-2009, 08:42 PM
Yeah, so I'm in the bookstore today and I see an older white haired man. I walk up to him and say "Are you Ivan Detwiler?"

He looks at me for a second and says "You are my granddaughter" and hugs me and starts crying.

This is incredibly odd as I've not seen nor heard from my grandfather in 10 years and the last I knew, he was living in Florida. Turns out, he is broke, divorced, and living with his sister not 10 blocks from my apartment.

We exchanged phone numbers and he wants to have dinner together and catch up.

My mom warns me not to get too emotionally involved as my grandfather is an incurable ass (my words, paraphrasing hers for ease of typing).

He is 82 years old. Maybe he wants to set things right before he passes on? Should I even give him the chance?

When my parents separated, my father's side of the family basically cut off contact with my siblings and I which was surprising as we are the ONLY 3 children in the entire family. I have no cousins and even my Grandparent's brothers and sisters have no children.

When my father ran off and left my mother with a mountain of bad debt and we lost everything (house, cars, etc etc) not a single family member stepped in. I cannot imagine that no one knew what was going on. We basically were left to be thrown onto the street. Luckily my mom found someone who was willing to rent to her while she was getting dragged through bankruptcy and I had saved up enough money to buy a car to loan to my mother until she was able to get her own. I was 17yrs old at the time.

Back to the present: what is you people's opinion?

Kute Kitty
01-04-2009, 02:20 AM
Give him a chance, and form your own opinion. If he does turn out to be as much of an ass as ever, you've had dinner with him once, built your own opinion, and never have to see him again. If he has decided to make something of himself, better late than never. Either way, you get a little bit more family - and it's up to you whether you choose to keep him around or not.

PrincessParadox
01-04-2009, 06:02 PM
Go for it. It's possible he really regrets how he treated you all, and if that's the case there's nothing you could say or do to him that could be worse than what he does to himself on the inside. If you give him a chance and he's willing to act like family then that's perfect.

If he turns out to be a git, you haven't really lost anything. And at least you won't be left wondering "what if".

durgarox
01-04-2009, 11:20 PM
Could be fate. I say hear what he has to say.

Hektic7
01-05-2009, 02:42 AM
I agree go meet him and see what he is like. You could always cut ties later if he isn't that great. If you don't you will eventually wonder what if, and that could bother you for a long time especially if he dies before you meet him. I hope that don't happen.

fledermaus
01-05-2009, 06:22 AM
Give it a chance. Maybe he's had a change of heart. People who are coming to the ends of their lives often re-evaluate how they've treated family and friends. It's possible he regrets abandoning you and your mom and wants to make things right. Good luck with this.